Quality professional “ally”ships are as difficult to come by as they are contributive to career success. Having someone speak your name in the right spaces feels like magic—the kind of behind-the-scenes effort that seems to drop opportunities into your lap. But this dynamic isn’t mystic; sponsorship is an intentional relationship requiring effort and awareness from both sides.

To sponsee hopefuls, start by understanding what motivates someone to sponsor you. Of course, there’s the rare and rewarding driver of a sense of purpose, especially in today’s work climate, where meaning is elusive. When a higher-up sees the impact of their advice or advocacy, it lightens the work of sponsoring you. A simple follow-up can mean the world. Don’t walk away from a 15 minute interaction where you used a sponsor’s advice to cool down a client and move on with your day; that’s the exact moment that needs to be shared. 

Then, there’s the halo effect. Everyone wants to be associated with the kid on the rise. For those of you who are competent but wonder why you struggle to win over supporters, keep in mind your social behavior. We’ve all seen the competent-but-mean types whose careers stall, and the less-skilled-but-charismatic people who somehow thrive. The goal is neither cynicism nor politicking. Instead, it’s about blending excellence with empathy—a very rare and admirable skillset.

Being both excellent at your job and thoughtful about others' feelings is hard, hard work. It’s frustrating to navigate sensitive, unpredictable feelings or work with folks whose learning pace doesn’t match yours. But still, the way you are known to make people feel often determines others’ willingness to back you. No matter how “right” you are, the way you make people feel is going to be a determinant factor in how you are treated in turn. To read more about blending integrity and compassion without losing power, see my article on “The Delicate Balance of Challenging the Boss.”    

For the veterans considering becoming a sponsor, I can’t recommend the relationship enough. If you seek a sense of fulfillment from it, step into the role with the spirit of genuine solidarity and intention of sharing success. Recognize someone’s needed contributions and consciously choose to invest your influence strategically to amplify it. Your advocacy opens doors for talented individuals to grow, not as competitors, but as collaborators. Their growth will happen against and alongside yours in a legacy of shared excellence—after all, steel sharpens steel.

Sponsorship is one of my favorite professional dynamics to see blossom. I’ve written about the friendships or romances that bloom at work but I want to offer some alternatives to those complicated, yet tempting dynamics. While mentorship and sponsorship seem small and boring as seeds, they bear hearty, healthy fruit. 

Happy relationship building—‘til next week!